Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Great Nothings

I have been thinking a lot lately. Mostly at the fact that I desperately want to be selfish, but I cannot seem to be. I do not know why really, but it has been annoyingly eating at me. Why, you might ask. Well, because I do not usually get what I want; not without a good fight at least. There is an opportunity that has arisen. I have been contemplating whether it is the right choice for the future. I have two options: One is to move somewhere cold, snowy, lonely, and not certain of the downtime, but definite great possibilities. The second is move somewhere close to home, great opportunities, near friends and family, but missing someone due to a job. What to do? I am sure that everything will fall into place just the way it is supposed to be; but getting into that place is what is hard.

Okay, exercise and weight time. I have stopped losing weight. Not because I haven’t been going to the gym, but because it’s time for me to cut back on MORE food and start toning up. I know I have to cut back, I know I cannot be eating certain things, I know I need to up my game – it sucks! When is enough, enough? When am I going to be completely happy with my body? Never. I bet even models and trainers aren’t totally happy with their bodies. I guess I just have to start seeing myself in a different light, maybe a different mirror.

Well that is enough for today. It’s short and simple, but that is all I have time for right now.

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